Americans Are Crying Fowl In Nationwide Wings Shortage

Breaking news…Chicken wings are in short supply.

As you can see from the above video footage, Kraft Foods–the conglomerate based in suburban Chicago–admits, at least in part, responsibility for the shortage.
David Ervin, Brand Director, Kraft Salad Dressing, says, “Authorities have informed us that samples of our best tasting Ranch ever have been leaked to the public. We understand that when it’s combined with wings, will-power seems to disappear. We apologize if this has contributed to the shortage.”
On the eve of a wings-eating event like Super Bowl 43, I don’t know that Ervin’s explanation or regret will appease the nation.
[via Steffan Postaer]

About David Burn

I wrote my first ad for a political candidate when I was 17 years old. She won her race and I felt the seductive power of advertising for the first time. Today—after working for seven agencies in five states—I am now head of brand strategy and creative direction at Bonehook in Portland, Oregon.