(Red) Crocs Jump The Shark

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Holly Burns of Nothing but Bonfires is on holiday in Singapore. Poolside the other day, she witnessed three adolescent boys considering their Crocs. I’m sorry to report that Burns was scarred by the experience.

Did you know this? Did you know that there was a Hierarchy of Coolness based on the color of your Crocs? Isn’t it enough that they’re all entirely hideous and that everyone on this tiny island seems to have become suddenly and violently obsessed with them, meaning that you can buy them on every street corner, in fact, so out of control is the madness that I could well have bought a pair AT THE OPTICIAN’S yesterday? Isn’t that enough? It used to be that people said “don’t get caned!” when you went to Singapore, and then they said “don’t get SARS!” These days, you can probably hear the cries of “don’t get Crocs! Oh please, please, no matter how good the exchange rate is, just don’t get Crocs!” from the departure lounge. Followed, most likely, by “and especially don’t get red ones!”

In the interest of full disclosure, I own a tan and a green pair of Boulder’s finest. Although I prefer not to discuss them, when another Croc wearer sees me with mine on, the mutual footwear choice does tend to break the ice.

About David Burn

Fired up to write it down. Co-founder and editor of AdPulp. Chief storyteller at Bonehook, a guide service and bait shop for brands.